


Deserving an Angel

by dreamerbydawn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, Established Relationship, M/M, Nothing explicit, mention of past prostitution, supernatural universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-13
Updated: 2014-09-13
Packaged: 2018-02-17 05:13:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2297825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamerbydawn/pseuds/dreamerbydawn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When a concerned Sam decides to poke his nose into Dean's new relationship with his angel, he finds out more than he bargained for...And why the hell was Dean Winchester abstaining from sex anyway?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deserving an Angel

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Mention of Dean's past working the streets.

 For a Winchester, difficult situations were nothing new. Heck, that was what their whole life was made of. But there is something about this particular venture of Sam’s that made it top his list of difficult situations he never wanted to be in.

 

 After all, discussing his brother’s sex life with his unbelievably naive boyfriend was just...not something he ever wanted to do. He wasn’t sure why he was subjecting himself to this anyway…

 

_Because Cas is your friend and you care about him. Because your brother is an absolute bastard sometimes._

 

 The small voice in his head has said that a hundred dozen times in just the past two weeks. It's been saying that every minute since he accidentally discovered that Cas was still a...virgin. The thought that an angel was a virgin shouldn’t bother him so much, it shouldn’t bother him at all actually; But when said angel has been in a relationship with a certain Dean Winchester for just over three months and still remained innocent, that’s something to worry about.

 

 Castiel thought nothing of it when a sputtering Sam asked again, just to check if the angel had just said what he thought he had said. In fact he clarified to Sam in very certain terms that no, he hasn’t had ‘intercourse’ with Dean.  

 

 Now that, that was bothersome on so many levels. His brother not sleeping with Castiel three months into a relationship sent warning bells ringing in Sam’s mind. Not wanting to bother the innocent - overtly innocent angel though, he had taken it upon himself to discreetly get Dean’s view on the subject and, surprise! He got nothing.

 

 Not when he danced around the topic - hey, it was his brother’s sex life, not a subject one wants to discuss! - not when he prodded or teased or tried in any way to bring up some sort of reaction from the man. And nothing, Dean avoided it like a plague, giving him absolutely nothing except headaches.

 

 So now here he was, standing in front of an angel of the lord, trying awkwardly to discuss the said angel’s sex life - or rather the lack of it, if one wanted to be very precise.

 

“I do not understand Sam” Was Castiel’s very confused declaration.

 

 If he had a dollar for everytime the angel said that, he would be a millionaire.

 

“You just have to trust me on this alright Cas? Just - just ask him” Sam insisted.

 

“You want me to ask Dean why he is not having sex with me?” Castiel asked doubtfully.

 

“Yes” Sam sighed. Sometimes, it wasn’t easy to have a painfully blunt angel around.

 

“Because you think that something is the matter with Dean” Castiel checked.

 

“Yes” He answered.

 

How had Cas not seen that? Dean without sex for three months screamed wrong to just about anyone.

 

“But Sam-” Castiel began when Sam heard approaching footsteps outside.

 

“Just, you gotta trust me Cas. Ask him” Sam said hurriedly before disappearing into the bathroom, avoiding chances of Cas bringing up the conversation in his brother’s presence.

 

Sure enough the door opened a second later to enter Dean who found a baffled angel standing in the middle, his perpetual frown creasing his brows.

 

“Where’s Sam?” Was the first question asked and Sam could hear the footsteps as Dean farthered himself from the door.

 

“He seemed to be in a haste when he abruptly-” Cas was saying but the sentence was cut off.

 

 This was one of the more confusing parts to Sam though. Dean wasted no chance to kiss his boyfriend, He had walked into enough of those scenes, but somehow they hadn’t slept together. And no, it wasn’t because Castiel had anything against it… Sam had gone through the trouble of finding that out too…

 

_'If we are talking sins Sam, I think I have quite a few on my list but no, I do not think it to be a sin_ ' and ' _No, angels do not require sex, we do not reproduce'_  and many more of those statements had been said when he had grilled the celestial being. But the bottom line was, Castiel didn’t have anything against sleeping with Dean.

 

“That’s fine Cas, he probably had something to do” He heard Dean say on the other side, his lips finally free enough to talk apparently.

 

 Sam wanted to make his presence known, now that he was slightly more confident that Cas won’t bring up the subject. But his brother had other ideas and, not noticing Sam in the bathroom, walked his angel back so they could fall on the bed.

 

Gulping a little uncertainly, Sam turned away unsure, not that it helped with the mirror placed almost too perfectly.

 

“But Dean-” Castiel began, only to be stopped mid sentence again. The kiss was over suddenly though and Sam could see Dean pulling back.

 

“Something wrong Cas?” Dean questioned and Sam could hear the frown in his voice.

 

“I - I suppose so” Castiel answered, his frown also returning. Sam was more than a little surprised when he saw Dean lean forward and place a kiss on where his angel’s brows furrowed.

 

“As adorable as that looks on you, I don’t like the frown angel.” The words were soft, tender and everything Dean wasn’t and Sam could only stare..

 

 Now would be a nice time to sink through the ground because every particle in him screamed to leave. But there was no way he’ll make it to the door without Dean noticing and even if that were a possibility, he was too frozen to move.

 

So he stood and watched, as Dean still stayed stradling Castiel below him, his hand caressing the angel’s cheek as they stared at each other.

 

“Tell me what’s wrong” Dean urged, his tone gentle with a good layer of worry beneath.

 

There was no mistaking the love in Dean’s words. There was nothing that said Castiel wasn’t the centre of Dean’s world.

 

“I should ask you something” Castiel answered, seeming unsure.

 

Sam’s eyes widened. Oh damn! No no no. Cas wouldn’t ask now would he? He would want to finish the conversation first right? Damn it!

 

Dean moved slightly, bringing their faces closer and placing another kiss on Castiel’s cheek, his lips brushing dangerously close to the other’s.

 

Sam swallowed hard. This was wrong. He was wrong. Castiel shouldn’t ask. Screw what Sam thought, they belonged together and nothing was wrong…

 

“Anything love” He heard Dean say and his heart sank further.

 

Love? Dean ran from the word like a plague and here he was using it as an endearment in his perfect relationship that Sam had no business meddling in.

 

“Why do we not have sex?”

 

 There was the question, dropped blunt as ever by the angel, and all the alarms on Sam’s mind went off again as he saw Dean react. His brother froze and though Sam couldn’t see his much of his face, he could tell that Dean had his lips parted in shock and his brows were touching.

 

 He was confident again. There was absolutely no doubt, he hadn’t read too much into it. Something really was wrong. It was clearer than ever in the silence.

 

“Dean?” Castiel prodded, frown back again.

 

 Sam watched as Dean withdrew a little more, almost attempting to stand; Stopped only by his lovers fingers around his wrist. He waited as the fair head ducked a little and sucked in a deep breath. Castiel’s lips turned down in disapproval and his hand came up to grab the hunter’s chin and raise his face.

 

“Do you want to have sex with me Cas?” Dean’s voice was soft and small and Sam almost didn’t hear it.  

 

Another stretch of silence as blue eyes stared intently at green.

 

“I don’t know. I wo-” Castiel answered honestly. Sam saw Dean nod and steel himself.

 

“Let me know when you do” were the words spoken as he finally broke away.

 

 Castiel sat up, his head tilted and his eyes still fixed on his hunter, and Sam knew he should make his presence known before Dean turned around and found him staring. But Castiel’s voice delayed the inevitable event of Dean finding him.

 

“It is an act human’s set much store by” He stated. His tone clearly observational.

 

And when Dean chose not to comment, the angel continued.

 

“It was a regular activity to you, so I suppose you agreed with its importance”

 

This time Dean’s hand fisted, as he kept his silence, and Sam kept his, but Castiel wasn’t quite done yet.

 

“And it is supposed to be very good. The act of sex between two people in love is considered sacred even”

 

This time the observation made Dean flinch and though Sam couldn’t see it, Castiel did and his eyes widened.

 

“Discussing this is upsetting you” The angel stated, moving to stand.

 

“No, I - uh-” Dean seemed to struggle for the right words, and he took a step back when Castiel moved forward, making the other pause, evidently hurt.

 

Sam felt irritation flash through him when he saw the angel’s expression and decided to clear his throat. Dean jumped before whirling around.

 

“Sam?” he asked in surprise “I thought you had gone out to get food”

 

“I was going to” Sam answered flatly.

 

“Right..well i’ll uh - i’ll go” Dean said instead and was out of the room in a flash.

 

Sam watched him go, his eyes narrowed slightly and his mind whirring at top speed when Castiel called his attention.

 

“Sam?” The single word had a dozen questions in them. Questions he wouldn’t answer until he got them first.

 

“Cas, listen. I think i’m going to have to talk to Dean” Sam said, his voice clearly displaying his displeasure.

 

Cas frowned, apparently equally displeased.

 

“What is going on?” The angel questioned.

 

“That’s what I want to find out” Sam managed to say without sounding too frustrated.

 

After studying him for a brief moment, Castiel was gone in a flutter of wings, leaving Sam alone in the room to work himself up over Dean’s stupidity.

 

Something he managed incredibly well by the time Dean was back.

 

 The older Winchester walked in after an hour, shot a discreet glance around the room as he set the food down, and took a seat. Before he could say anything that would effectively disregard the previous conversation held within the room, Sam spoke up.

 

“So you don’t sleep with Cas” he commented bluntly. Dean’s hand froze before he could reach for the fork.

 

“Didn’t think you were interested in my sex life Sammy” He said, voice too casual.

 

“Because apparently now you don’t have one” Sam dead panned.

 

Dean seemed to get the point that Sam wasn’t going to let this go and green eyes levelled with his.

 

“Which is still not your business”

 

The words held a warning, and barely controlled anger beneath, but Sam was one of the very few who could ignore it effectively.

 

“Actually it is” He answered as he moved take a seat across Dean.

 

One eyebrow raised to challenge his statement and Sam grit his teeth.

 

“Cas might be your boyfriend, but he’s also my friend” he pointed out, stressing the word boyfriend to try and make Dean react.

 

Green eyes flashed and though Sam didn’t know it, it wasn’t for the reason’s he was assuming.

 

“And exactly what does that mean?” Dean questioned through his teeth.

 

“It means, that while he might be too innocent to realise it, I know exactly what is happening and I won’t tolerate it” Sam snapped.

 

“What are you getting at Sam?” Dean asked, suddenly deciding to cut the chase.

 

“I am saying that your sexuality issues should have been dealt with before you decided to have a relationship with him” the younger brother answered, making no effort to hide his annoyance.

 

“You think this is because Cas is a guy?” Dean asked, surprise momentarily winning over.

 

“It isn’t?” Sam asked, also thrown off.

 

“Dude i’ve been with men before.” the older Winchester clarified, rolling his eyes and leaning back.

 

When Sam looked disbelieving, Dean snorted.

 

“What you thought I turned bisexual yesterday? Or rather three months ago?” he questioned.

 

Actually yes, that’s exactly what Sam had thought. And Dean had never given him any reason to believe otherwise before…

 

“You are supposed to be smart Sammy” Dean was relaxed again, evidently hoping this topic was over.

 

He really should know his brother better though, for Sam was only waiting to get over his shock.

 

“So why haven’t you jumped Cas?” he asked, now confused, and Dean choked on his food.

 

“Hell Samantha, what’s your problem?” he snapped, annoyed.

 

“Whats yours?” Sam shot back, too annoyed to bother with anything smarter.

 

“Right now, you” Dean mumbled, stabbing his food viciously

 

“Dean” Sam threatened.

 

“What? Now you want to police our sex life?” Dean asked, nettled.

 

“Non existent sex life” Sam said not bothering to budge from his point.

 

“We can take a break Sammy. Butt out” was the sharp order.

 

“Break? Please,Cas is still a virgin and...wait is that it? he’s a virgin?” He asked before catching sight of Dean’s expression and flushing a bright red and forcing himself to awkwardly continue “I mean do virgin guys mean differently from-”

 

“DUDE!! He’s a frikkin angel of the Lord!” Dean shouted exasperated.

 

Instantly the tables turned and Sam was comfortable again while the red crept up Dean’s face.

 

“Seriously? When did you realise that Dean?” Sam mocked, earning a hard glare.

 

“Drop this. Now” Dean ordered.

 

“Or what? Honestly, you are unbelievable. You know that?” Sam questioned, crossing his arms against his chest.

 

“Sam, I swear-” Dean began threateningly.

 

“What are you going to do then? Stay in a relationship and just never sleep with him?” Sam cut across and when Dean shrugged, the younger brother looked incredulous.

 

“That’s - you - huh, yeah like that will happen” He dismissed, rolling his eyes at the very idea.

 

When Dean chose to not reply again, Sam watched him eating dutifully.

 

“You realise you won’t hold out right?” He asked, now curious that his brother - the man who needed sex like a chain smoker would need his cigarettes -  was intending to what - abstain? - from it.

 

“Watch me” Dean snapped defensively.

 

“Dean? Are you serious?” He asked, now more disbelieving than anything else. His only answer was a glare.

 

“Dude come on that’s...that’s ridiculous! I mean Cas doesn’t seem to have a problem with the idea of sleeping together anyway” Sam cried out. How idiotic could Dean get anyway?

 

Once again the older brother choked on his food before raising an eyebrow, this time looking just as incredulous as Sam had a couple of moments ago.

 

“Said something about it not being an angel requirement and everything but-” Sam began to mumble when suddenly Dean’s demeanour changed.

 

“You asked Cas about this?”

 

There was real promise of danger in the tone now and Sam glanced up worriedly.

 

“You also got him to ask me about it”

 

When Dean arrived at that conclusion, Sam was tempted to deny it no matter how accurate it was.

 

“God damn it!” Dean swore angrily.

 

“Dean-” Sam tried but his brother over rode him.

 

“Even if you wanted to interfere, you should have asked me!”

 

“I just-” He tried again.

 

“What? Jumped to conclusions?” Dean snapped. Sam wanted to protest but his brother wasn’t done.

 

“Conclusions about _my_ sexuality which again means you should have come to _me_!”

 

“I would if you were willing to talk about-” Sam began in defense

 

“So you go to Cas? Because he’s innocent and-” Dean began heatedly but Sam only got annoyed.

 

“Yeah, he’s innocent! The same innocence you are using to your advantage because he can’t tell that it's not normal for a couple to not sleep together in months!” He shot back.

 

“Thats not even true! Not everyone jumps into bed-” Dean started when Sam had had enough.

 

“Yeah, not everyone Dean. But you do. You always do. I can bet this is the longest you’ve gone without sex in - oh I don’t know? When did you start sleeping around anyway? Cuz you’ve always had company for as far back as I remember”

 

The words hit Dean like a sucker punch and if Sam hadn’t been so angry, he would have seen the flash of something darker in those green eyes.

 

“And you’ve always complained about it! Now suddenly, I don’t have sex and you got a problem with that too!! What the hell is your deal man?” Dean questioned, his eyes blazing.

 

“Mine? Mine?!? You are the one that’s giving me lame ass answers. I mean since when do you care that Cas is an angel anyway? You got him to drink and watch porn and-”

 

“And I draw the line at him losing his innocence to a whore damnit!” Dean shouted, finally angry enough to give in.

 

When Sam looked stunned, Dean smiled almost bitterly.

 

“What Sammy? Does it shock you so much that I may have morals too?” He mocked.

 

 The words stung. He remembered all too well the number of times they have fought over Dean’s sex life, and he recalled perfectly well having called his brother a man whore more times than he cared to count but - he had never…

 

“Dean! I - I know i’ve said things but I never meant-”

 

“Don’t you dare say you didn’t mean it Sam, because I know you spent your life thinking that. Isn’t that why you were so desperate to find _‘the one’_ ? So you wouldn’t turn out like me?”

 

 There was no mistaking the bitterness there now and Sam winced. Those were also words he had used before and maybe they had hurt Dean more than he had let him know.

 

“Okay. But Dean, You love Cas and if you are finally changing -”

 

Sam was cut off by harsh laughter, the sound cold and absolutely humorless.

 

“You can’t change the past Sam” His brother said coldly as he moved to stand. Sam was still reeling when he saw Dean begin to walk towards the door.

 

“But you can change the future Dean! I mean you got Cas now and you deserve-” Sam began to plead, when Dean turned to look him squarely in the eye.

 

“And what about Cas? He deserves his first lay to be with some cheap whore? Thought you said you care about him Sammy”

 

Sam was never given a chance to reply though, because there was the familiar sound of fluttering wings as Castiel appeared the usual two inches away from Dean.

 

“Never. Call. Yourself. that. again” The angel growled, blue eyes searing through green ones.

 

 Sam let his jaw drop, never really having seen Castiel angry at someone who wasn't a demon he was about to smite, and it didn’t really help that Dean had, because he was still as taken aback by it, as the times before. He leaned away from the angel though as he attempted to figure out what to say.

 

“You forget Dean, that I know. And I do not care. If anything I am insulted that you assume I would”

 

 Castiel’s words were blunt as ever, and Dean’s eyes widened suddenly, the shock becoming something else. Something that Sam did not recognise immediately - because damn it! How many times do you see Dean Winchester display fear?

 

“I have watched you your entire life Dean. There is nothing I do not know” Castiel said seemingly answering a question that Dean had just been about to ask.

 

That only seemed to make it worse, because Dean turned away and closed his eyes.

 

 Sam however looked between the two, not really sure what to do. Even he could only roughly estimate the number of people Dean slept with and yes, it was high and well higher than anyone would be comfortable overlooking, but if Castiel knew everything like he had said, then they could work it out and Sam should - just keep staring at the dirty carpet.

 

“Will you look at me?” Castiel questioned and Sam glanced up to realise the words were directed at Dean and not him.

 

Dean who was refusing to open his eyes even though Castiel was holding his chin up.

 

“Dean, I don’t care” Castiel said, his words slightly softer.

 

And suddenly green eyes were glaring defiantly at Castiel.

 

“You don’t care? You don’t - you are an angel goddamnit!” He cried angrily as he drew back.

 

“I am aware” Castiel answered dryly. Picking now of all times to develop a sense of humor. Sam would have rolled his eyes another time and Dean huffed anyway.

 

“Yeah well then, let me tell you. You should. You are supposed to. Because humans care. They care about this stuff a lot” he clarified.  

 

“One’s action cannot stand testament to his character unless the other person is entirely aware of the reasons for the action Dean.” Castiel stated, his moral grounds clear.

 

“Yeah, that doesn’t apply to when you whore yourself out” Dean informed, bitterness back in his voice.

 

Sam desperately wished Dean would stop saying that, and apparently Cas agreed with him.

 

“Do not use that word.” was the command from the angel.

 

“Oh? You find the word offensive but you’ll sleep with me? thats rich” Dean sneered.

 

“The term is offensive Dean and is typically a person who-” Castiel tried before Dean interrupted.  

 

“Yeah I would know the meaning of a word that defines me Cas. Thank you” he said.

 

“Apparently you don’t know a thing. Because yeah, you slept around, but without money involved, the term doesn't apply” Sam shot at his brother, annoyance creeping up again.

 

“Like I said, I know exactly what I am Sammy” Dean retorted without thinking.

 

 Sam was about to press the issue, an argument already on his lips when he saw Dean’s expression of pure unadulterated horror. For a moment that disoriented him, but Dean was already whirling around, ready to make his escape when Castiel caught him.

 

“He had to know sometime Dean” The angel said softly

 

“I need...alone...please” Dean was beyond forming full sentences and reluctantly Castiel let go of his lover.

 

 The younger Winchester, who had finally let the words sink in, was currently not very different from a fish, as he kept trying to get words to form, but closed his mouth each time and finally Castiel turned his way.

 

“He was fourteen the first time he had sex. Your father did not leave enough money for sustenance and the offer made was one he was inclined to take given the predicament. Dean always insisted on getting a job but your father was against the idea, telling him to make do with what was given because it was never safe to leave you alone. He walked away from that life the first chance he got Sam.”

 

 The angel’s explanation was a low murmur and Sam saw pained blue eyes looking directly at him. He could only nod weakly as the words registered in his mind. He heard them but he wasn’t sure he could overcome the shock enough to make sense of it yet and the angel did not seem inclined to wait.

 

Not when he could appear in the Impala next to Dean.

 

“I’m sorry” The words were a soft whisper.

 

The fight had left Dean, his guard was down as it generally was when it was just the two of them, and so emotion filled eyes met Castiel who was looking genuinely apologetic.

 

“I didn’t want Sammy to know” Dean whispered back.

 

“It was never your fault Dean” Castiel assured gently.

 

“It was my choice Cas. No one forced me into it” Dean argued sadly.

 

“That is true, but it was your choice to not let your brother starve.” Castiel  reminded gently.

 

“And I don’t regret it. At least I didn’t...not until you…” Dean replied in a small voice.

 

“Why do you regret it now when I already told you I don’t care?” the angel asked “Do you not believe that it does not matter to me?”

 

“I believe you….I just...you said it should be sacred Cas...I’m anything but. And you don’t deserve-” Dean tried to explain to him honestly, the many emotions struggling to break free.

 

“No Dean, I don’t deserve someone like you. No one does. You-” Castiel began, the words filled as usual with appreciation for Dean.

 

“Don’t. Please don’t. I can’t take it if you justify it. I did what I did and if I get called for it, then there’s nothing I can do.” Dean cut across firmly, shaking his head in a negative as he spoke.

 

 Castiel fell silent, simply sitting next to the other as Dean returned his face to be buried in hands and it was a good ten minutes before another word was spoken. In fact, they were spoken so suddenly and with so much conviction and bluntness that Dean was startled, a part of him had almost forgotten Cas was there.

 

“I want to have sex with you”

 

 The hunter raised his head to look at the angel but Castiel chose that moment to punctuate the statement with a kiss. Surprised as he was, Dean pulled closer, kissing back fervently and locking the two of them together with his arms.   

 

 This was obviously a cue for Dean to get them both to the bedroom but the angel did not really know to do anything beyond kissing and so Dean could bring himself to resist a little as he pulled back.

 

“I want to Cas - so badly, but there’s - it’s not so - even if you weren’t an angel, you are pure and innocent and everything good. You know how out of my league that is?” Dean whispered, his face still inches away from his lovers and his breath hot against the other’s skin.

 

“You think selling your body is a testament to your character somehow, but then so is the fact that you kept it from your brother no matter how many times he questioned your actions” Castiel answered

 

“That was because I couldn’t. I was too ashamed.” Dean admitted quietly.

 

“Sam is the last person who will look down on you for this Dean. You know that” Castiel chided.

 

“He’s still human Cas. Humans care about this. Call it a habit”

 

 There was a sad smile that tugged up Dean’s lips and the sight of that was physically painful to Castiel who was reminded again just how deeply he was in love with this man.

 

“Then for once I am glad I do not have a complete grasp on humanity” The angel answered before once again closing the distance between the two of them.

 

 He knew his resistance was growing weak of course, it had been weak to begin with anyway. And when Castiel reminded him that he had died and his body had been rebuilt with all the previous scars wiped clean, he decided to give up entirely...but not yet.

 

Breaking apart from another kiss, Dean let his fingers play in the dark hair even as he watched Castiel in the glow of the street lamp outside.  

 

“I love you” He whispered softly, letting him know silently that he was really done fighting it. Castiel’s answering smile was radiant.

 

“I want - my first time meant nothing but yours has to be different. Just give me a few days alright?” Dean pleaded and he knew Cas would agree...because honestly Sam was right, the angel still did not really have a grasp on any of this and Dean found it endearing.

 

Actually, he found everything about the angel endearing and there was no one who could make him as happy as Cas did…

 

Except Sam. Dean corrected in his mind as he returned to the motel room to be greeted by a small note instead of his brother.

 

                                              _I don’t know if I should thank you or apologise. I don’t know if you will ever want to talk about this._

_But Dean, If anyone deserves a real live honest to god angel, its you._

_\- Sam_

_P.S: I got another room._

  


**Author's Note:**

> This is a one shot but there could be a follow up with Dean and Cas's first time.... you know, if you are interested. Either way, thanks for reading! Please do let me know your thoughts :)


End file.
